Pinterest

I realize that Pinterest is beginning to get in some legal trouble, struggling with copyright infringement issues. However, I can confidently say that Pinterest has been a beneficial part of my life for the last year. I am an active user of pinterest, though I am not the most avid user I know, and have found it to be helpful and inspirational. Ideas that I never would have thought of on my own are displayed- it becomes motivating to realize that projects are not only possible, but that I am capable of completing tasks with a how-to process. It inspires my inner creativity, and often is the beginning of beautiful gifts or delicious cupcake recipes. I am SO grateful for pinterest!

I can honestly say that out of all the things I have pinned I have successfully accomplished about 25% of them (of course that doesnt include my wedding board, since that day has not yet arrived).

Now that I have expressed my appreciation of Pinterest, I will resume browsing its pages and pinning things that catch my attention and inspire me.  Until next time...

All my love,

Sara Lynn.

PS- If my real wedding looks anything like my pinterest wedding, I will have the most wonderful reception in the world.

Fulfillment

I am continuously amazed at the way God works in my life. He is always doing something, and whatever that is, always is preparing me for the next thing. There is not one event or one person that I have encountered by chance. It has all been part of a perfect plan that has been preparing me for what is to come. 

My freshmen year I went through absolute heart-ache and disaster. What I knew the world to be blew up in my face and I was left hurting and confused. Later that year the woman I was supposed to room with told me she didnt want to sign a lease with me, fearing we would ruin our friendship. The next day I got a call from Housing, offering me a position as an RA. All that hurt and heart break prepared me to counsel and love and sympathize with the 80 women I would be taking care of in the two years to come.

Its still hard to swallow, that I'm done being an RA. That is something I have identified with very closely the last couple years. My heart and soul went into taking care of the women around me. Everyday God used one of those girls to give me the peace of knowing I was right where I needed to be, serving in the way he called me to.

I have learned SO much about myself, and about others through this job. What I am beginning to realize now is why I enjoyed that position so much. Being on duty through the night, getting phone calls about lock outs, suicide attempts, conversations about bringing girls to counseling for eating disorders or roommate conflicts. Writing reports on people breaking the rules, and dealing with way too much alcohol...none of that is fun. None of that is easy. But it is through serving that I learn to love.

When I give of myself to others, only then do I feel as though my life has purpose and meaning. I was able to serve those women in a beautiful and very unique way. That chapter of my life has closed, and now my prayer is that the Lord will open up new ways for me to serve. New people, new opportunities.

The purpose of my life is to live a life of purpose.

Today as I sit at the coffee shop sipping a delicious smoothie and enjoying some down time (now THATS a new feeling!) I am extremely grateful for each person that I share my life with. If you are reading this, please don't hesitate to share with me one small way that I can serve you. Are you a lover of snail-mail? Home cooked meals? One on one time?

What can I do to serve you?

All my love,

Sara Lynn.

#YOLO

The hot thing right now to say is YOLO. What does it mean, you ask. This stands for You Only Live Once. The motto that people have been trying to follow for years, one that is supposed to be intrinsically motivating to life a good life, and to leave a legacy. To enjoy each day as it comes. In today's times however, such is not the case. YOLO is an excuse to party hard, to drink until unconsciousness. Its an excuse to make poor decisions and to justify irresponsible and irrational behavior.

This summer, YOLO is going to be my motto, because it is the truth. I only have one life to live. Each day that comes, also goes...with no opportunity to get it back, to try again. This summer I am making a point to do something each day that is worth noting, worth remembering. Take this journey with me, and see what sort of beautiful things I encounter, the lessons I learn and the little ways in which I am embracing #YOLO.

Summer 2012, let the fun begin.

<3

Goodbye

Goodbye summer of two thousand and eleven. You consisted of many things, too many to expose in the text of this blog post. Please know that I am so grateful for each and every one of you that I was able to share this summer with.
Sunshine and swimming pools.
Children and arts and crafts projects.
Weekend trips away.
Blessed Pop John Paul II Junior High Leadership Camp
20(or so) pounds gone
A zest for life
A better understanding of the woman I want to be.

When people have asked how my summer was my automatic response has been "Eh, alright." It seems as though everyone goes through a mourning process that the summer has come to a close. We enjoy it to much, we hate to see it leave. It does not do my memories justice to simply say "eh, alright." My summer has been full of new people, wonderful adventures, and many lessons learned. Though I am going to miss the extensive amount of free time, cooking for myself, and earning a heavy weekly income, I am beginning to be excited about what this school year brings.

I have accepted the challenge to be an RA for one more year. God is so good and I just cannot believe the beautiful and numerous ways he works in my life. I always end up right where I am supposed to, and what a breath of fresh air that is.

Keeping this in mind, I trust that I am exactly where the Lord has called me to be, third floor Nelson hall! I know its going to be stressful, time consuming, and frustrating at times. But I need not forget that I am where the Lord wants me to. So though my environment may be hectic, I will be able to rest in the peace of the knowledge I am where I am supposed to be.

Goodbye summer 2011. You have enabled me to become a better woman, and I cannot wait to see what the rest of this calendar year has in store.

Love always.

Awareness

Today was a beautiful and wonderful day.

Today was the big National Raise Awareness day for TOMS shoes and all the children that go without shoes. So..to take part in this wonderful cause I went barefoot all day. The looks and remarks I got were very interesting. Some people were proud, some people were confused. Some people were grossed out and said things like what about germs? But really this day was a lot more than I expected it to be. The weather was warm, and most of the snow is gone from the sidewalks so walking around barefoot was not too much of an issue. The water in the puddles was cold, and shoes had to be worn in the dining center (for obvious reasons) but those were the largest struggles I encountered.

Walking barefoot allowed me to taste 1/100th of what those children must endure everyday. Today I had the choice to not wear shoes, but not all people in the world have the liberty to choose. Every step I thought about children half  way across the world...these thoughts quickly turned into prayers.

Going through my day constantly keeping a prayerful mindset was such a beautiful blessing. It is so easy to go through the motions, to check things off the to do list, and to turn in for the night before giving thanksgiving to the one who created you.

Today I grew a lot in appreciation for the things I do have. Sometimes I get so caught up in complaining about how stressful my life is, how how many problems I have. Being barefoot really gave me a reality check...a much needed reality check. I am so blessed.

Got a really great workout in this afternoon. A killer Zumba class that worked my entire body, some killer abs thanks to p90x, and then a good hour of throwing the frisbee around. It feels so good to be able to be active, and to be active outside! I had so much energy throughout the entirety of the day, and it felt great.

Ended up mending a broken friendship, which alone could be an entire day maker.

Then finished off the night learning some more guitar. What a beautiful way to end the day.

I am so pleased with the outcome of this day. With my attitude, with the lessons I learned, with my physical activity. I am definitely going to bed with a light heart, and a big smile. If every day could go like this...life would be simply wonderful.

This lenten journey I have been learning SO MUCH about the poor. Makes me realize that I'm not called to go to Jamaica this summer to learn more about the poor there, when I have so much more learning to do about the poor right here!

Together.

I wish I could say that this journey is an easy one- but its not.
I wish I could say that the answers to the questions are black and white, but they aren't. There is a lot of grey.
But why be so wrapped up in searching for certainty. Sometimes, the most certainty is in the fact that things are always uncertain.

You never really have things figured out. Things can always change. Because we have a God who has a plan, and who has a will for our lives. Each one of us was created with a mission and a purpose that only we can fulfill. Nobody else can meet the mission set for you besides..you!

I had a beautiful talk last night with one of my supervisors about the question of If God has a plan for me, how do I have free will? Because he knows what I am going to choose anyways. This was such an uplifting talk, and it was so inspiring to have it be with my supervisor, of all people.

God created us, and as we come to know him, he trusts us to make decisions. When we keep Christ in mind, he trusts us to make decisions that are not large moral decisions. Sometimes we are given options to choose and either way will lead to great things. When there are forks in the road, sometimes there isnt one particular direction we are supposed to go...when we keep Christ in mind, he trusts us to make the right decisions.

...That is why I have the freedom to choose. That is why you, don't write it all down for me. That is why you let me decide the choices to make through the course of my life. So if I hold the pen will you steady my hand, and together we can write my life story..... (New song lyrics, still in the process of being developed. Yahoo!)

Thanks for being a silent reminder of Christ. A true example of his love. No amount of thank you's would suffice for my gratitude and appreciation of you.

Yours truly,
Sara Lynn.

Mother Nature sometimes has this crazy way of ruining our plans.
Sometimes I forget that Jesus takes good care of me.

This has been a crazy few days, no doubts. Im going to blog about it!

All last week I was looking forward to traveling to South Dakota to Sioux Falls to see the lovely miss Leah Hansen. She is a beautiful woman, and her friendship is a priceless gift to me. We went to high school together, and knew each other since about 7th grade but for some reason we were never really close until shortly before our senior year. We had not spent much time together until we went off to college. Our friendship has grown deep through the Lord, and it is such a blessing to catch up with her. When she is home from college, we always make sure to catch up at our favorite place- Moxie Java. I have not spent a TON of time with Leah, so I was really looking forward to getting away from Moorhead and spending some quality time with her.

Friday afternoon finally came around, and my father sent me a text message. I called him, and he told me that there was a storm coming through and that I needed to be careful. So I said I would. He called me later the afternoon, and told me if I was going to leave, I needed to get out of town quickly. If I could make it to Watertown by 6, I should miss the bad part of the storm and drive right out of it. I hit the road around 3:30 with pure excitement for a great weekend! Everything was fine and dandy, the sun was even shining. I was a bit perplexed that there was supposedly a "storm" coming through. About 1 hour and 30 minutes in, I hit a slight sprinkle. I giggled and said something along the lines of, well this I can drive through. About 15 minutes later the temperature dropped dramatically, and my rain drop speckled car quickly became frozen over. My side windows for so frosted over I could not see out of them! It became dark, and the rain turned to snow. The wind picked up, and all of a sudden I was caught in an awful snow storm. My brakes were wet from the rain, and quickly froze up when the temperature dropped. I could hardly see 10 feet in front of my car, I could barely see the tail lights of the van in front of me. We were now driving 25 miles per hours on the interstate with our hazards on. A slight break in the wind came, and I was able to see a semi driving in front of the van I was following. A few moments later the semi signaled and moved off the road, the van in front of me followed, as did I. We got out of our vehicles, and the semi truck driver asked what we would like to do. He said he would continue to drive if we wanted to continue to follow. We all agreed that would be our best plan.

We continued on down the road, driving very slowly, and not able to see much. A large gust of wind, which I now know was about 55 miles per hour, blew at my car and caused a little bit of panic.  My car started to fish tail on the icy road, and I swear my heart stopped for a moment. I regained control and continued to drive. Again a large gust of wind blew. This time, I saw the van in front of my press hard on their brakes, so I did too. Then I saw the semi begin to blow sideways across the interstate. As the back end hit the ditch, the semi truck began to lose control. Moments later, the semi truck began to tip over. The van in front of me pulled off the interstate into a gas station. I was glad to be following someone because I could not see that there was a station there, and had NO idea where I was. Just as I parked my car and walked into the gas station, they announced that interstate had been closed. The semi truck driver was fine, not even bruises.

I stood in front of the beef jerky in the gas station leaning against the shelf extremely confused and unsure of what was to come for the rest of the evening. All of a sudden, a girl who lived in my building walked through the doors. I was glad to see a familiar face. We chatted for a while, and I made some phone calls letting everyone know I was alright. It took a while for me to realize that I was going to be here for a while....

Two hours later, the store had completely filled up. The cashiers told us there were about 150 cars and semis parked in the gas station...I found out I was in a town called "Summit" at a store called "The Coffee Cup". I called my friend Beth Hill, who lives in a town called Sisseton, which I passed about 45 miles back. She said the area I was in was the bermuda triangle of south dakota. The weather is super sketchy and unpredictable with the hills around this area. I came to the realization that I was stuck, and stuck for the evening. Jen and I grabbed a spot in the corner of the store and sat down. I read, she listened to her ipod. A few hours later Craig,an RA from another complex at MSUM, walked in. Jen and I were both extremely pleased to see another friendly face!

He said he was parked outside with his girlfriend. They had their computers in the car, and seasons 4 through 6 of HOUSE. Craig bought a power strip converter to plug into his cigarette lighter. With a charged computer, we piled into his car to watch for the night. The walk from the door of the gas station to Craigs car was the worst walk I have ever taken. The wind blew at you so hard it caused you to lose your balance. The snow was flying around so much that from being outside for 6 seconds, I was drenched from head to toe. All of our clothes were white with snow as we opened the doors to the car. There was one point where the wind hit me so hard I could not breathe, I was literally panicking for air. We got into the car and everything was wet. The inside was wet just from opening the doors. Our clothes were soaked. We turned on the heat, and cuddled our blankets and watched House and How I Met Your Mother.

Craig went in to grab some munchies, and to use the restroom. He came back to the car, and said he saw Nick Mullin, who is another RA at MSUM! Nick and I are really good friends, and I could not believe that he was stuck at this same gas station too! I called him, and told him to come out to our car and watch movies with us. He ran out and told us his crazy story..

Nick was on his way from Moorhead to his home in Watertown. He was about 4 miles away from Summit when he pulled over because he could not see anything. There was a guy in front of him that was also driving a truck. They had pulled over a couple times to talk about what to do in this crazy storm, though they did not know each other. Nick sat on the side of the interstate in his pickup for about 4 hours before a squad car came to get him. The cops dropped him off at The Coffee Cup where he was to stay for the night. He was by himself, and Im sure was very grateful to know someone there!

There we sat, a big party of MSUM kids in a car, stranded in the middle of south dakota. We put smiles on and made the best of it...for a few hours. 1am rolled around, and we were all REALLY sick of sitting in a cramped car..sick of the weather..and just wanted to get where we were going. Nick and I went back into the store, thinking we would jut sit in there for a while to stretch out. When we walked in there were people EVERYWHERE. sitting on boxes, coolers, broken benches, shower stools...and many were laying on the floor. The whole place was littered with sleeping bodies! Nick and I grabbed a tiny spot on the floor and just chatted for a while. After about an hour, we decided to go to my car. We started it up, and hung out in there for the rest of the night. We would alternate turning the car on and off...listening to music and talking. We both wanted to sleep, but it was extremely difficult. At least we could kick back our seats and stretch out. I was so glad to be able to be with someone I knew, and someone I loved. Nick was truly a God send. It was no coincidence that we ended up there together. I loved being able to catch up and find out new things about him. When you are with someone in such a stressful situation, they really get to see your true colors, and it was fun to have those revealed.

As the night turned into morning, we kept our ears on the radio, hoping for some news about the roads opening up. First they thought 3am, then they thought 5 am. We then got news that the roads wouldnt be opened until the wind died down, which wouldnt be until around noon. Around 7am we started to get pretty restless. I would toss and turn. Cry...out of frustration and disappointment. After sitting in the car for that many hours, and hearing about the terrible road conditions...I realized that I was not about to make it Sioux Falls. After the stress of all this, I did not want to travel 2 more hours in poor weather and poor driving conditions. I made the disappointing phone call to Leah telling her I was calling off my road trip. I was in tears. Lack of sleep, and high emotions made for a very sad and tear filled Sara.

I had fallen asleep around 9:30 and Nick had snuck out around 10am to pick up his car from the side of the road. He got out there, and his truck wouldnt start, so he had it towed back to the store. The news came around 12:30 that the roads were open! The store emptied very quickly, and many vehicles were out of there as soon as they could. We tried to start Nicks car, but it would not go. Our other friends from MSUM got on the road, but I stayed behind to help nick figure out what was going on. We bought some Heet to pour into his gas tank to unthaw the gas line, but that didnt work either. We jumped it, but it just would not go. By this time I had a huge break down...I was so frustrated, and I was so disappointed that I would not be able to go to Sioux Falls.

Nick called his dad, who sent out a family friend to figure out the truck situation. He could not figure it out either. We came to an understanding that it was simply too frozen to start. They hooked Nicks truck up, and towed it back to Watertown. I called my friend Beth back, and asked if I could come stay with her. I had driven all this way, I did not want to turn around and drive back to Moorhead for the rest of the weekend. Her family was so welcoming and wonderful. They said yes!

I arrived to a huge hug from beth, and her mother. As I pulled into their driveway, I burst out in tears happy to be out of my car, and in a house! Warm food in my belly was greatly appreciated after having 4 meals at the gas station. A comfy couch, a big screen TV, movies, and a warm bed...this terribly, horrible stranded experience turned into a wonderful weekend at the Hill farm.

As much as I wish I could be with Leah in Sioux Falls, I have come to an understanding that things dont work out exactly how we want them too. You never know where life is going to take you, or where you could end up! This misadventure being stranded at a gas station turned into a blessed relaxed weekend at the farm.

I told Beth that I was so blessed to be warm, and not in a ditch. I proceeded to tell her "God's got my back" he replied, "he's got your back, and your front, and your sides." Thank you, Beth Hill, another comment for the Journal. (On this note, maybe I should start another blog, and fill it with all the funny comments from the mouth of Bill....keep your eye out for a possible new link!)

All in all, I have learned a lot in the last few days. And have grown in deep appreciation for the wonderful people I have in my life. It is amazing how much people surprise you. Being stranded in that gas station, everyone there became a family. We shared our cell phones, our blankets..people paid for other people's food so they could eat. The tow trucks gave free tows to everyone on the interstate. People shared their jumper cables and their plug ins. It was wonderful to see the giving of people. Its interesting..but sometimes tragedy brings out the best in people.

I said earlier that being with someone that long brings out their true colors. I just said that tragedy brings out the best in people. Over the last couple days, I have truly seen the beauty of peoples hearts. Full of community, hospitality, giving, and gratitude.

I appreciate you all so much, and hope your spring break is off to a wonderful start. If its not, please remember that its all about how you choose to make it.

I choose to have an adventure filled spring break, and no doubts, it is off to a good start.

Questioning.

I am the person that loves to be busy. I thrive on being with other people and to be running around. Thats what makes my clock tick. Thats what makes me work. But for some reason, the last couple weeks..I have been so busy that sometimes I feel like my world is spinning.

Some people take offense to the N word, some people take offense to the R word...but lately I have been getting very defensive when people use the B word. No not the female dog..the B word I am referring to does not exist in my dictionary. I can honestly say I have no idea what this feeling is any longer. BOREDOM. I can honestly say I dont remember what it feels like to be bored. And I get really frustrated with people who complain about being bored. There is so much to do in this world...so much to do in this town...so much to do on this campus..that I seriously cannot even fathom what it would be feel like to be bored. Maybe this is because I have ZERO down time and enjoy every last second of "free time" that I get, I dont know.

Maybe by now you're thinking stop complaining Sara, this is your life you chose to be busy so suck it up. You know what, maybe youre right. But right now, I need to write what is on my heart and thats what Im doing. So- if you dont want to hear it, stop reading. Tough love.

Sometimes I get frustrated when people say that RAs don't do anything. (There is where the venting gets tricky, because I am going to strive to maintain professionalism here without breaching anything) Let me tell you the truth behind it. As an RA, I must work a minimum of 4 hours at the front desk per week. I have to attend a weekly staff meeting that lasts about an hour. I meet with one of my bosses every week anywhere from 30 to 60 minutes. That right there consumes 6 more hours of my week than a typical student. But my position is not about the meetings I attend, or the time I put in manning the computer and answering questions. The real truth about my job is that my RA position...my focus is on relational ministry. About building relationships with the women to live on my floor. Every day when I leave, when I come home, when I move about the building..I have to stop and say hi to my girls. Can you imagine walking past your RA and not saying hello? No...because that should not happen. Now, I am telling you...this relational part of my job IS MY FAVORITE. I absolutely positively adore it. It is what keeps me going. I love my residents and I love the women who live in my building. But building and maintaining relationships takes time..So yes, every single week my job takes up A LARGE chunk of my time.
 Not to mention that I am a Dragon Ambassador...now that job takes an extra 2 hours every week. Plus I coach skating...which takes another 6 (or so) hours every week. On top of being a student. And having somewhat of a social life (or trying to). Add time dedicated to devoting my life to the Lord, plus working out and staying healthy PLUS going to class...This balance thing....is killing me. So please, don't try and pretend that youre busier than I am. Or that you have more things going on than I do. Or what you do is more important than what I do. Because, that might be true. But I definitely dont think I am busier than you, or have a more stressful situation than you. Because we all handle things differently..and what may be busy to one person, may not be to another. It just really gets me fired up when people think their battle is a harder one to fight than other peoples...when really, you have no idea. I have no idea. We need to be humble and understand that.

Its the hardest thing to figure out..how much time to spend where. Truth is, in high school, grades were the number one most important thing for me. I graduated valedictorian, 4.0. All that got me was a scholarship. What I have come to realize and understand that college is much less about my grades, and more about my experiences while I am here. So though your suggestion may be drop something to eliminate stress, truth is that all the outside things I am doing are (almost) more important than my school work. Thats where the saying comes in that D's get degrees. (Please let it be known that school is still very important to me, and I do care. Its just a different perspective that I have gained.)

Am I crazy? Yes. Is this blog post just a really long rant about my life because I am extremely crabby today and my emotions are running on high? Yes. But part of blogging is being able to look back and reread what you have written to see the growth that has been made. I look forward to the day when I can look back on this post and say, I made it through those times and they made me a better person.

Better days...they are to come...right? 

You know..sometimes I watch these Hollywood movies and think to myself..is life always a happy ending?

The things that we want dont always happen....
Our biggest dreams don't always come true.

Maybe thats why the industry makes so much money...people like to watch things that make them happy, then become fascinated with the idea that their life will be a happy ending. Just like in the movies.
Noah and Ally end up together...John and Savannah end up together...the love story always works out.
Maybe because real love never gives up hope.

So.. here's to you. To my real love. This night my heart is a mess and I look at the stars  praying that God created you for me, and that when the time is right I will get to meet you. I pray that I have a happy ending. Whoever you are...my love for you is real love, and I refuse to give up hope on you. But let me tell you, these last few weeks have been hard. And Hollywood makes me wish time would go by faster so that one day they could make a story about our lives. I'm trusting in a plan...and praying that you are too, so one day, when the time is right, our lives will meet and we can write the ending of a happy story together.

Dear whoever you are....see you soon then?

Love Always,

Sara Lynn.

Not Lucky- Blessed.

God has a sense of humor, you know?

He must, because we are all created in his image and likeness. We could not know humor is Jesus does not know humor, right?

Every situation..I mean every single situation..always has its way of working out. It may not be how you want it to, or how you expect it to. Its never easy. But in the end, everything works out. Something will always come from it. We aren't in control of what happens to us, but we are in control of how we react to those situations. We have a choice- we can choose to let it weigh us down, or we can choose to learn from it, to grow, and to move forward.

Though the last few weeks have not been easy, they have been full of revelation. God is good, and always has a reason and a plan bigger and better than I can fathom.

Here it is- I never ever ever wanted to be an RA. Long story short, God smacked me on the side of the head and threw the opportunity in my lap. Couldnt have been more clear what He wanted me to do. Here I am, beginning to understand why I have been called here. Realizing the beauty that has come from this amazing opportunity.

Realizing that a big reason God placed me here was to meet the woman of my dreams- Miss Bethany Hill. As I told a dear friend tonight...somedays I wish she were a boy. Then we could get married and my search for the perfect man would be over. She is the female version of a prince in shining armor- always scooping in to save the day. Friends like her are every girls dream, and she makes my dreams come true. (FYI- I dont really wish her to be a male...just to clarify)

Someone told me once that I was extremely lucky to have the friends that I do, but luck has absolutely nothing to do with it. God has got it all in his plan, and knows exactly what I need. I am not lucky, this did not happen by chance. To put it simply- I am blessed.

Truth Is.

Truth is, I'm a sinner. I try and do well. To be well, and to serve well.
Truth is, I fail. I don't always let God radiate through my life as I should because
Truth is, the devil is fighting for my soul just as hard as my Lord is. There is a battle being waged over me, and truth is, I don't always fight for Christ. I make mistakes, and I screw up, but truth is I'm still trying. I am striving for holiness, to be the woman that God wants me to be, but truth is it's not easy. It is hard. Its the hardest thing of my life, to be a woman of faith and not a woman of this world. Truth is sometimes I get discouraged and sometimes I settle for things that are easy because truth is, whats worth fighting for is far from easy. But this earth is not where my life ends, and this earth is not where I want to stay. Truth is when this life is over, I want to be with Christ forever, and truth is, I want you there with me. I am fighting the ways of this world for a life that I know is worth it, but truth is, sometimes I forget that. Though I know I cannot do it alone, sometimes I try. Truth is, I need you. Truth is I need to surround myself with people who want these same things. I need to be filled with people who share in this same revelation. Do you know these truths? Will you fight with me?